Over the past weeks I heard a few stories where people I know were accused of having anger issues. The same thing happened to me, too. The catch here is that the people casting the blame were actually directly causing the anger they didn’t approve of. Say you hit someone, which you KNOW will hurt them and is a wrong thing to do, and then when the other person becomes angry you say: “you have too much anger inside you, it’s not fair you are letting it out on me”.
Now, this would probably piss off even the not-so-angry inclined amongst us. But while I was struggling not to explode (because proving someone right is just no fun), I started to think about it a bit more. Maybe I really am an angry person…with angry friends.. I do know that I would miserably fail the “Bike through Amsterdam without losing your temper test”. But really, why do people bike so slow, so fast, so stupidly, so…in my way! And really, why do they allow cars and scooters in the centre anyway. Also, why do tourists think they can cross the road without even looking? And definitely: all pigeons MUST DIE. Clearly, the only people that would pass this test are trained buddhists or stoned tourists.
Even though I could easily blame the city, I realise I am not the most peaceful person on earth. It seems to get worse in times or situations where I feel unhappy or not in control. It is not something I am proud of, but I am working on it. I’ve also started to see that anger is usually a sign that I need to change things (you know, simple things, like quitting my job, giving up my house, moving abroad. But that’s a whole other story).
So while my friends and I are looking in the mirror to examine our issues, the manipulative anger-causers would do well to start being useful too. Here’s an idea: go kill some pigeons.
To all the rest of you: please spread your love to all people and animals. They need you.